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alcohol free hen do

The Ultimate Guide to Planning an Unforgettable Alcohol-Free Hen Do!

If you’re putting together a hen for a bride-to-be that doesn’t drink, this guide has got you covered. We’re here to talk you through everything you need to think about. Like, will the other guests be drinking? And, themes that are as crass or as classy as suits your bride (penis straws optional). From personalised mocktails to venues that will have you wondering why you ever feel the need to drink anyway, by the time you finish this article, you’ll be able to plan an alcohol-free hen do that will have your bride-to-be feeling like the star of the show – not an afterthought her friends turned up to get drunk around. Remember, she’s not going to have any alcohol induced amnesia, so read on to learn how to make it one to remember – whatever the budget.

P.S. if you, the reader are thinking about taking a break from alcohol, check out the 31-day Alcohol Free Transformation Course while you’re here.

31 Day Alcohol Free Transformation

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Table of Contents

An Alcohol-Free Hen Do…

Think of a hen do and what do you conjure? Willy straws, pink everything and prosecco for days. A bar crawl or typical night out is normally on the cards. In fact I just asked my friend GPT to make me an image of a classic UK hen and here’s what it delivered. I didn’t even need to ask it to include alcohol.

So, it’s not surprising that organising an alcohol-free hen do can feel daunting. But with the ideas below, you’ll be able to plan something so original that your other guests won’t be left wondering what time you’re hitting happy hour. An alcohol-free hen do doesn’t have to mean compromising on experience, it just means you have to put a little more thought into thinking about what your bestie loves and what makes them unique. Actually, if you think about it, a classic knees up can be kind of underwhelming and samey. That’s not what we’re here for.

Important Questions to Ask

So, the first thing you need to consider is… is this an alcohol-free hen do for everyone?

Important questions to ask are:

  • How does your bride-to-be feel about alcohol?
  • Does she despise it?
  • Does she despise being around drunk people?
  • Or, is she OK being around it and letting loose on a dance floor?
  • Is she likely to feel slighted if the night ends in a kebab shop & she’s babysitting someone who’s got a bit carried away? / Can your intended guests be trusted not to get too carried away? Or is there potential they might ruin the night if it is in an alcohol centric place?
  • Are there any other guests you know of who don’t drink? (aka, someone to get advice from, someone to be a sober buddy on a night out, someone who can help with suggestions for AF fun?)
  • Is it the majority of people who enjoy getting pissed vs one bride-to-be that isn’t?
  • What would she want? If in doubt just ask! Not for specifics (those should be a surprise) but whether she wants to go out dancing or she wants something whacky, or wholesome.

Generic Questions to Consider (and make it extra special)

  • What is your budget to be inclusive?
  • Is this a hen do for friends or friends and family?
  • What age groups are you catering to?
  • What makes your bride-to-be unique?
  • What are a list of her favourite things? Places, people, colours, foods, music, films, a certain era? USE THESE.

Bring your answers with you as you read through and hand pick the options that make the most sense, for an alcohol-free hen do that will keep everyone happy.

Themes

When you take alcohol out of the equation, hen do themes get a little more creative. Firstly let me caveat – you might not need a theme. But if you’ve got a small budget for it, it’s a super nice touch and can really help set the tone for an alcohol-free hen do! It will give you more than just a dress code. It will help to tie everything together. Make it aesthetic, thoughtful and personal – if you pick the right theme! It will bring together your decor (if applicable), your stationery (if printing itineraries / your own games), your food and drink choices and make planning fun! Once you niche, choices get narrowed, decision making gets easier.

Some popular themes right now are:

The Last Rodeo – cowboy themed (great for swifties who probably already own several pairs of cowboy boots…).

The Last Disco theme is also super fun. Think 70’s, disco balls & Abba. Mamma Mia She’s Getting Married!

Till Death Do Us Part – for the emo that grew up. Bride or Die also fits this aesthetic.

Chill Til The Chapel – aka PJs & Polaroids. Think hair turbans, sunnies & silk PJs. Super easy to make goody bags for too! Check out the shades here, the turbans here, the face masks here.

Classic: ‘She’s Tying the Knot’, or ‘Wife of The Party’ and incorporate her favourite colours or if she loves the 90’s, make it 90’s themed for example…Think outside the box! I mean come on, have you seen the Shrek theme for the Shrek obsessed hen? If you’re friend has a weird quirk or obsession and a good sense of humour – LEAN INTO IT.

If you’ve got more of an ethereal bride to be, consider something vintage or fairytale themed. Or, got a more adventurous bride? If something outdoorsy is on the cards, think ‘Wife in the Wild’ or ‘Wow before the Vows’. You get the idea!

AVOID At All Costs: Margs & Matrimony, Drunk In Love, Prosecco & Pearls, Margaritas with my Senoritas.

Venue Ideas

Next, where is the hen do going to take place? Arrange the location and everything else will start to fall into place. Most options are alcohol-free friendly, you only really need to avoid the stereotypical ‘night out’ – unless your girl is a party animal even without the booze. If in doubt, ask her.

When choosing the below best to think about whether the hen will be a one day thing or longer. That will really dictate your options. And don’t be disheartened if your dream location is out of budget. Let’s say your bride-to-be is obsessed with Italy but you can’t all afford to go… Bring Italy to her.

Ideas For Alcohol-Free Hen Do Locations / Venues

  • Renting a cottage or using someone’s house – gives full flexibility on all aspects, decorations, activities, catering… Good for one night or a weekend.
  • City Break (UK or Abroad) – think instagrammable food, days spent exploring. Needs good planning & activities.
  • Spa – Can be a stand alone thing if your girl is chill, or tacked on to the above.
  • Theme Park – a super fun, non-alcohol centric day out. (Just be conscious of any pregnant guests).
  • Live Event (concert or festival) – is there someone she loves touring at the right time? Or a big festival happening? Perfect for a single day or a weekend if travel is required.
  • Overseas – hire a villa & enjoy time with your besties. A little decoration and one special day for her can go a long way – especially if getting your trip out of the group chat is impossible! Two birds, one stone.

Activities & Games

Games and activities are the heart of any hen do, and there’s no shortage of alcohol-free options to keep everyone entertained. Once you have an idea of where the hen do will take place, it’s time to start shaping your itinerary. It can be really hard to please everyone so if the hen do is taking place over a weekend, consider making some of the activities optional, letting guests pick and choose what they want to partake in.

Ideas for Alcohol Free Hen Do Activities:

  • Games Night – can be bride themed – trivia about her, her and her partner, or simply her favourite games.
  • Cooking class – is your girl obsessed with a type of food? Go and make it together!
  • Dance class – it won’t be for everyone but doing something ‘out there’ like a burlesque class can be a little ‘out of your comfort zones’ thing that will have you all giggling without the booze.
  • Zen Day – if you’re headed down a restoration weekend then check out unique yoga classes (like puppy yoga) & sound baths.
  • Eating – seriously. Afternoon tea (very safe), dinner at a hard-to-get-a-table restaurant, a hot brunch spot (that offers a soft drink package) – RE brunch, there’s really something for everyone these days, school hymn singing, japanese bingo, UK garage… some will be messier than others but as long as there is an actual activity beyond getting hammered, it should be enjoyable for all.
    • TIP: If you are booking tables for restaurants & brunches, get in touch with the venue and make sure you tell them 1. It’s a hen do and 2. The hen doesn’t drink. Ask them to make it special. Ask them to make sure she has AF options & to pull the stops out. You don’t ask, you don’t get…
  • Laughtercise – a superb ice breaker that will have you cry laughing – even if you’re an introvert.
  • A show – Is there a show she’s always wanted to see? For example, if she’s a big Abba fan, something like Mamma Mia at the O2 is a super fun day out.
  • Ru Pauls ‘Bag’ Race – (the brainchild of my very own maid of honour) – split into teams, 20 minutes to create your catwalk ready wedding dress using only… white bin bags.
  • Games – don’t overlook them, activities are key for when drinking isn’t the main focus! You can look for hen do specific games or check out our favourite party games here.

Your job as chief organiser is to make sure that everyone is having so much fun, they’re not pining for pints of wine to feel at ease.

Mocks Over Cocks

It’s quite trendy to have ‘his and hers’ drinks at weddings now, but given the expectation to be drinking at a wedding, a sober bride is unlikely to follow this trend… So why not follow the trend with mocktails on the hen? If you’re at a venue where you’re in control of the drinks, why not design and serve her, her very own unique mocktail – made to her taste. Or, if you’re going to be at a restaurant or somewhere catering to you, reach out to management and see if they can design your bride-to-be her own AF drink.

If you are at your own venue, (someone’s house or an Airbnb), consider setting up a beautiful mocktail making station, with fresh ingredients that can make the plainest of drinks feel indulgent. Think fresh mint, berries, orange slices, cinnamon sticks, syrups… maybe the bride has a special glass to drink out of too. Choose upmarket soft drinks for mixing and consider AF alternatives (if your bride-to-be drinks them). We have a tonne of recommendations here for rum, beer, cider, rosé, gin and prosecco.

Managing Expectations

Whatever you decide regarding the presence of alcohol, make sure it is communicated clearly. If your bride-to-be doesn’t care whether alcohol is present or not, you may not need to communicate this at all. But, if she feels strongly about it? You might want to manage other guest’s expectations. A couple example messages for you below…

TIP: Be conscious of what you’re asking. Some people genuinely don’t believe they can have fun without alcohol – and we’re not here to shame that. For a chill day filled with great activities, most won’t miss it. But if you’re asking them to drop serious cash on a weekend away and not drink? There will probably be some grumbles. If you’re unsure, check in with a couple of level-headed guests and find a compromise. The last thing your hen wants is to hear friends bailed over a booze debate.

For the completely Alcohol-Free Hen Do:

Hey girls! A quick heads-up as I’m finalising plans for [Bride’s Name]’s hen do… Since you all know she doesn’t drink and isn’t exactly thrilled by being around it, we’re making this a totally alcohol-free weekend – all about her! I’ve planned some incredible things, and honestly, no one’s going to miss a glass of wine. Promise. Thanks so much for being the kind of people who’ll help make this really special for her. I can’t wait for us all to have the BEST time xx

For the bride-to-be who doesn’t drink but has messy mates…

Hey ladies! Just popping in with a little note as I put the final touches on hen do plans. As you know, she doesn’t drink – but is totally cool with being around it, so yes, we’ll be heading to a few places where alcohol is served (dinner, dancing, etc). That said, I’d love for us to all be a bit mindful that it’s her weekend – and ideally it doesn’t end with her holding anyone’s hair or hailing a taxi outside a kebab shop at 2am. Basically: good vibes, classy chaos, and a night she’ll actually remember for all the right reasons. You lot are the best & I can’t wait to celebrate her properly! xx

Managing expectations early on can rule out any shock disappointment from guests expecting a full blown knees up. At the end of the day, drunk people tend to be bad company for sober people and it’s your sober besties day – that needs to be considered by the people who care most about her.

Gift Bags

What do you put in a goodie bag when you’re not cramming it with stuff that fuels a hangover and then cures it? Well, following the same theme… You could create an energising going out kit or a post-night-out wind down kit (or ideally a blend of both). Honestly, coming home at 3am with ears ringing from the music, adrenaline is still high and even without any substances, it still takes a hot minute to decompress. If you’re going on a wild night out, consider making the bride-to-be a personalised goody bag to help her get her beauty sleep. (I particularly like this idea because she can continue to use these things in the lead up to her big day).

Pre Hen Energiser Kit Ideas:

Post Hen Wind Down Ideas:

If you’re looking for something to put your items in, Amazon have some ‘Team Bride’ bags that are not unreasonably priced and are a decent size.

Tips For Planning An AF Hen Do

Well, planning an alcohol-free hen is not dissimilar from planning an alcohol fuelled one and I’m not here to saturate that market further. What I can offer are tips to make your alcohol-free bride-to-be feel incredibly considered and blown away.

  • AF Options: Scout out the Alcohol Free menu’s ahead of time where applicable. Sadly, not everywhere as an AF menu that parallels Dishoom’s. If you’re going somewhere that doesn’t have a decent AF menu? Call them – make sure they pull the stops out for her. Ask to bring your own for her if need be.
  • Keep Everyone Entertained: Ensure there are games or activities at all stages to keep people occupied – it’s OK to go to a places with alcohol as long as you know your hen will be comfortable and there’s a group activity beyond bottomless margaritas! Think activities like electronic darts, mini golf, or playing a ‘hen do’ game you brought with you.
  • Designate a Sober Buddy: If there are nights out, designate a sober buddy. Someone willing to prioritise the bride-to-be for one night. Someone who will still be able to have a cohesive conversation with her if it’s getting messy and someone who is able to take charge if things go south. Take turns to alternate if it’s more than one night. DON’T TELL HER YOU’RE DOING THIS.
  • Pre-empt & Stop Peer Pressure: If your hen hasn’t been off the sauce for that long and / or there are some people who are oblivious (or simply ignorant) of her decision, make sure to have a word with any potential ‘just one’ brigaders… You should pick up on this when you manage expectations (see above). If you send out a message & anyone replies with ‘surely she’ll have one, it’s her hen’ or similar, these are the people to target. Make sure they know these types of comments will upset her and to park them for the event.
  • Plan Your Energy Curve: Be smart about how you structure the day! We’re not doing a boozy brunch and running on alcohol fumes for the entire day. Add rest stops, down time and refuelling in your itinerary. Think: AM Activity, followed by a nice lunch and decompress, followed by a PM activity, followed by down time to recharge the social battery and get ready for the evening’s events. If you’re not local but also not staying the night, consider asking a hotel (like a travel lodge) for a day rate (should be cheaper than staying the night). So you have somewhere to freshen up and be horizontal for an hour if needed.
  • Use Music to Set The Mood: Build your playlists with care. Try to avoid the usual night out hype mix all about getting bladdered and only living once. YOGOL (You only get one liver). If you’re doing some relaxing activities, keep it chill. If you’re getting ready to go out, absolutely hype it up just be mindful and of course, include all her favourite artists.

Conclusion: A Hen Do to Remember (For All the Right Reasons)

Planning an alcohol-free hen do isn’t about what you’re taking away – it’s about what you’re intentionally adding. More connection, creativity and memories that, well, actually form.

Whether you’re going fully alcohol-free or striking a balance to make sure your sober bride feels celebrated not sidelined, the goal is the same: to make her feel like the star of the show, not the designated driver at her own party.

And guess what? When you get it right, nobody misses the Prosecco. They’re too busy laughing, bonding, soaking it all in and thinking: wow, we should do this more often.

So regardless of which direction you take the hen, just know this. You are creating something personal, thoughtful and completely unforgettable for one of your nearest and dearest. So have fun with it!

And hey – if planning this has you wondering what your own life might feel like with less alcohol in it… you know where to find us!